Do You Confuse Who You are, with What You Have Been Through?
Self-sabotage without knowing it?
Some people let their past plague their future and this robs them of experiencing the success they envision for themselves. Sadly, most people don’t even know they are doing this. Many people rely on their past to guide their future decisions and this can sabotage their efforts because they are not their past. Still, many people think that their past equals their future. This is okay, if your past is the future you want to continue in, however, if it is not, then you may be sabotaging yourself without you knowing it.
People who are new to learning the power of self-command are often confused about what they have been through and who they are. Some people think they are a product of what they have been though. I don’t buy that. I believe I am a product of my thinking and my future creations stem from the thoughts I use in my mindset tool box right now.
You want to create a better life, have deeper relationships, more money, more freedom and a happier disposition and you go “looking” for that. You often think, “There must be something wrong with me and I have to fix it or I won’t/can’t have everything I want.” You think the life you want eludes you because you have not “fixed” a broken part of you.
So you spend your life trying to “fix” yourself so you can have the experiences you want before you die. A lot of so-called “Gurus” like when you think like this because it supports their income levels.
Quietly sabotaging yourself without knowing it!
The sabotage happens because you start thinking that you’re broken and you spend your time looking for ways to “fix” yourself so you can have these “better life” qualities. If you believe the Law of Attraction as I do, then thinking that there is something about you that needs to be fixed first, only invites more of that in your life. That’s when the “looking” will take up your whole life journey and you never get to experience what you want because of the confusion created by your thinking that you are your past experiences and somehow you need to “fix” yourself before you can have anything good.
This trap of confusing who you are with what you have been through can destroy your life if you do not let go of that form of thinking. You are not the abuse that happened to you. You are not the trauma you experienced. You are not what you tell yourself. You are not the horrible thoughts you have in your head and you are not the bad, guilty or wrong feeling you feel. You are much more than that.
Map your outcomes
On the other side you are not the soul mate you found. You are not the multi-millions you just made. You are not the successes in your life. You are not the new car you have. You are not the fame you have. You are not the adoration from other people. You are not the incredible happy joyous feelings you feel inside. You are not the new career that you have found. You are more than that.
Again, all of these things are just experiences that you are having in the game, illusion or mission of life. The questions you must ask yourself are, “In this life experience, which of the above two scenarios would I like to experience?” or ”Of all those experiences, which appeals to me most?” Because, these experiences are created and are a result of a mindset/action process you can learn, it’s a “how to” guide to charting your mindset course in the direction you want to go in. Instead your thinking is a tool and you are asking yourself, “What experience would I like to create?” Then map that out.
Steering your mindset
This is so important to ask yourself because it allows you to command your outcomes more and helps you become clear about the difference between what you are capable of creating now and what the past is. These two things are very different from each other and don’t have anything to do with each other. Yet, often people confuse the two.
Self-command is the practice of steering your mindset and what drives you. Moving your life in the direction you actually want to go in and learning to let that lead the way. Self-command requires that you become response-able. It requires your willingness to possibly surrender how and where you learned your past thinking process and become skilled at driving the vehicle of you, in a new way. It requires that you make adjustments to your thinking habits because that is the key to tweaking your experiences to the ones you actually want to manifest. It shows you how to drive the vehicle properly.
Learning Self-command
Self-command teaches you about who you are so that you can stop being who you are not. You are not your experiences. Learning self-command is simple and easy. It requires a lot of self-awareness. Not awareness in the places that you already have it. It requires awareness in the blind spots and places that you rely on most during your day. It requires that you pay attention to places inside you where you can be sabotaging yourself without knowing it.
When you decide to no longer use your thinking to define who you are but use it as it was meant to be used, mindset is a tool that draws experiences to you, then you will begin the journey of implementing self-command and creating your reality as you would like to experience it. So, I want to be clear here and share my definition of mindset. This is important because many people don’t use all of their mindset. They think that mindset is a process of thinking. For me, this is only one part of mindset.
Thinking is a process that invokes an outcome. It has a biological outcome in my brain. If I say “that makes me mad,” my brain creates a chemical cocktail and distributes it throughout my whole system and I “feel” mad. If I say “that made me happy,” the same process happens. It does not mean that I am an angry or happy person. It is simply a biological function of what I have said to myself in the moment. What I say to myself in the moment either impairs or empowers all of my outcomes.
It’s like drinking whiskey, if you drink whiskey you “feel” drunk, you don’t become the whiskey. If you have one shot it may be medicinal, if you have 6 shots you’re impaired. I am not the whiskey I drank yesterday or today and I sabotage myself when I think I am the whiskey I drank yesterday or spend my life trying to repair the whiskey someone else drank years ago that traumatized me.
Really, what I am saying to myself about that past is what is traumatizing me and my outcomes. My, at the moment, thinking affects my present moment now. If, at the moment, I am thinking about my traumatizing past, it affects my biochemical present moment and is either impairing or empowering my present moment abilities. What’s important to know is that I am the one doing that, not anyone else.
For me, mindset also includes my heart and my body. When I am in the right mindset, all of me agrees. My brain, my heart and my body can feel empowered all at once. This invokes the most power, inside of me. When I envision a creation, my mindset is all of these parts and they help me create that experience. I don’t become the experience I just get to experience that moment. I don’t become rich, I experience wealth. When I want to create a new experience my mindset will help me create it but my thinking will either impair or empower it.
Confusing who you are with what you have been through can take you out of your life. I would invite you to practice commanding your mindset in a way that helps you have what you want. Stop trying to “fix” yourself.
Find a mentor or coach who is experiencing what you would like to experience and have them teach you how to create it. Follow their map and set your course to their charts and you will get there. Make sure they are really where you want to be before you follow them.
As always, I would love to hear your comments and ask you to please forward this post by using the share the love tabs below.
May you direct your dreams.
Although I am put off by most of the self help Gurus, I liked your post. I liked the emphasis on not thinking you are what you have experienced. You are not what you do to earn money either. You kept it real and not mysterious or metaphysical. I will be back.
Hello Bruce
Thank you for your reply…I like direct and honest replies…and although I don’t tout myself as a “self-help” guru…I appreciate your understanding the emphasis of a post vs. the topic of a post….for me…this says you have a lot of discernment…and right now I believe, the world could use a lot more discernment. I look forward to talking with you again.
Thanx
Vickie
Vickie
love this blog, When I came to the awareness that the past is truly gone, and became aware of the differences of punishment and self worth, Punishment lives in the past, and is always ready to raise it’s head and punish again and again for the same mistake. Self-worth looks at the mistakes as growing pains. and can move forward.
Thanks again for having this blog,
Dennis
Hello Dennis
What you say is so true. I am glad that you are enjoying the blog. Thank you for your support of it.
Vickie